I Walk By Faith...

Sunday's message, "Why I Doubt", at Journey was about doubt and faith...

John 20:29 ~ Jesus saith unto him, Thomas, because thou hast seen me, thou hast believed: blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed.  (yes, this was Christ talkin' to one Doubting Thomas)


I walk by faith
Each step by faith
To live by faith
I put my trust in You
I walk by faith
Each step by faith
To live by faith
I put my trust in You


Every step I take
Is a step of faith
No weapon formed against me shall prosper
And every prayer I make
Is a prayer of faith
And if my God is for me
Tell me who can be against me?


And it struck me not for the first time that a personal relationship is much the same as a spiritual relationship. 

We haven't seen Him but we trust in God to guide us, protect us, carry us when we're overcome...  we share the good, the bad, and the in-between...

And we...  well, I, anyway...  look for exactly the same thing in a personal relationship...  and as in a spiritual relationship, if we're not so battered from life's storms that we're just not able any more, we take a horrendous leap to have complete faith in someone we can never fully know, hand them our heart and trust blindly they won't man-handle it and leave it bruised and bleeding in the dust...

In my universe, I've had plenty of failure on the personal relationship front...  not because I shouldn't have had the blind faith in my partners that I at least started with, and not because they were bad people...  but because they just didn't have that same view of what a partnership was about that I did...

Cheating...  lying...  stealing...  none of these things fit into the definition of personal partnership...  none of these things fit into the definition a spiritual relationship either...  because each of these things precludes trust and faith... 

Yet knowing this, again and again I've chosen "partners" who've possessed one or all of these personality flaws; knowing all the while these things would never be part of a spiritual relationship - they couldn't be - but tolerating them in my personal partnerships just the same...

Unfortunately, it took until a few years ago for me to figure out that someone with the same view of a partnership that I have is crucial and non-negotiable from the outset - I guess I thought that was something couples came to in the course of life together - and although it's only just recently I've cleared my own slate in that regard, I know now I will continue in a conscious, purposeful, earnest way to try to know myself and make intelligent choices to make that happen in my life...

And I know that in my spiritual and personal relationships I want and need someone I can give undiluted love to and have it returned, I want and need someone I can talk to, lean on, give and receive support from, share with and beat my chest to...  

I know that I want and need that soul who, when I relax and sink down into that downy bed of trust I'm still willing to give and expose that soft, terrified part inside, will NOT bring me to my knees by stomping around on it like they're stomping dandelions but who, instead, will wholly justify that release of doubt...

And I know they're out there.  I have faith...